Baby It’s Cold Outside!
Eighteen years ago, I went to a Kenny Chesney concert. After the concert, a friend suggested we go to a party at Jesse Dees’ house. Without hesitation, I agreed. Unbeknownst to all, I had a secret crush on this tall redheaded stud.
Things couldn’t have gone better. He practically begged me to go out with him and before I knew it, the party had cleared, leaving just the two of us there. We watched Spiderman. As the movie was coming to an end, Jesse started saying he didn’t want me to leave, that I should stay longer. Then he said I should stay the night. “What kind of girl do you think I am??” I exclaimed. He quickly back pedaled, saying he didn’t mean anything by that, only that he didn’t want me to leave and I could have his bed and he’d sleep on the couch and then we could do breakfast in the morning together. Thru this exchange, everything in me wanted to stay. The crush had been smoldering for almost a year. He was handsome and funny and frankly I didn’t want the night to end either, even though I knew I needed to go home. We already agreed to go out and I surely didn’t want to give him the wrong idea. But my goodness I wanted to stay.
Remembering this flirtatious evening still gives me butterflies. The secret crush has since turned into holy matrimony. And he still gets me.
For the last handful of years, I’ve been telling him that we are going to karaoke ‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’. He has zero interest in actually doing that, but when I sing it and dance around the house, I definitely imagine us; He and I, during that June 24th evening so long ago… the push and pull of flirting and boundaries and difficult no’s and wanting to say yes’s.
This song has gotten quite the rap lately. Talking about rape culture and cancel culture. This song is about crushes, and holiday romance, and hope and possibility. If you want to talk about music that is disrespectful to women… just turn on some gangsta rap! THAT is ant-woman. NOT this beloved Christmas classic. What is the intent in calling out this song and interpreting it as if the man is trying to rape the woman? To teach women they don’t need men? That they have a right to say NO? That sexual pressure is unacceptable? I agree with ALL of those statements! However I disagree with the idea of tearing down and misinterpreting things to further a message. How sad that some people think that a woman can’t be swept off her feet, or enjoy a flirtatious holiday interlude without being in danger of being raped or giving up her independence. WE women CAN BE independent, we can say no, we deserve respect and to be listened to… and in the same world, we can allow ourselves to be swept up in a snow globe scene and whisked away on a romantic journey with a tall redheaded stud if we want.
Baby… it IS cold outside. This season, I hope you find yourself in a situation that makes your heart pound a little harder than normal, that gets your blood pumping a little faster, and that makes you feel sexy. Because we get to be safe, successful, strong, vulnerable AND sexy. A new relationship? Maybe! A notable glance from a stranger? Possibly! Looking back at memories of a long love and really clinging to some of the steamy ones? YES! Shaving your legs and putting on a special nightgown on a week night? Ok! Taking advantage of the dining room table for something more than just dinner? Perhaps! Starting a new tradition of wrapping presents together wearing only your skivvies? Sounds fun! You do you Girlfriend. And have so much fun doing it. And just remember… not every guy that holds the door for you in a sexist pig that thinks you are incapable… he may have just been raised right to be a gentleman that is thoughtful and respectful. If that’s not your cup of tea, pass him on to the next lady… there’s plenty of single gals out there looking for one of the good ones.
