YOLO has got to be one of the stupidest catch phrases of this generation. I am past the age of those that frequently use it, but I think it is used in conjunction with doing something dangerous, or stupid, of which the consequences could land you in jail or in a morgue. So, again… very stupid.

Although I plan on NEVER actually using the term YOLO, the concept is a good one if used appropriately.

YOLO… You Only Live Once. Did you really read that sentence? It’s so cliché, but so underestimated, so ignored, so wasted.

A question I have found myself asking is, “What do you want people to say about you at your funeral?”. This may seem a little morbid, but it is such a good way to put your life into perspective. It isn’t about other people’s opinions of you. It’s about how you are living, the kind of person you are, and the kind of influence you have on other people’s lives.

If you had died yesterday, and your funeral was tomorrow… what would people say about you?

Would people have a hard time coming up with nice things to say about you? Is your best quality that you had a good job and provided well for the family? Does it matter how much money you made, if your kids didn’t feel you loved and accepted them? Does it matter what kind of truck you drove, if you left your wife feeling unappreciated? Does it matter how beautiful and skinny you were, if the people around you considered you fake and self-centered? Does it matter how clean the floors were, if you had a mental break down every three months from being overwhelmed?

Life is overwhelming. Change is even more so. But WE ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE TO LIVE. Don’t waste it. Make it count. Each one of us changes the world, a little bit every day, especially if we are parents. Everything we teach our kids, every nuance they adopt from us, every feeling they experience, affects every relationship they will ever have in their lives… therefore it will affect hundreds of thousands of people. It will help shape the kind of parents they will be. Our actions will have ripple effects long after we are gone.

Some people say that I overthink some things. Probably true. I just can’t get over the important role that I’ve been given. I have been blessed to be RIGHT here, RIGHT now, with a purpose to care for, nurture, teach, and protect these little people, and to be the best wife I can be. That is a very serious responsibility. How selfish to ignore it, or to neglect to do my best because of my own discomfort.

At my funeral, I hope my children will say that I opened my mouth with wisdom, and that on my tongue was the law of kindness, thatfuneral_400 I lived love, and was generous and accepting. I hope my husband will say that I was selfless, supportive, did not eat the bread of idleness, that I was fearless and strong through adversity, that I put our family as my top priority until the day I died. And I hope my friends will say that I was always there when they needed me. Above all, I hope everyone that knew me will agree that I worshipped Jesus with all my heart, soul, and mind, and that I had faith like a mustard seed.

I’ve got work to do to be that person. And that work is every day, in every moment. I’ll fail sometimes, I’m only human. I just hope that these are the over-arching, endearing qualities that describe my life when it’s all over. Wisdom, kindness, love, graciousness, acceptance, forgiving, selfless, supportive, hard-worker, reliable, strong, faithful. And I guess fun too 🙂

I don’t do what I do, so those words will be said at my funeral. I want to BE that kind of person, and even though the proof is in the pudding of action… it starts on the inside. I have to BE that kind of person on the inside before the fruits will ever appear on the outside.

Sometimes I need to step back and take inventory of who I am. And if I’m not who I want to be at my funeral… then I’d better change who I am now. YOLO