The Wheel that Doesn’t Squeak

After I posted the Dees-Day-Seven-Dredge-Report (AKA Sequestered with Teens; Day Seven), I really got to thinking about the term, ‘the squeaky wheel gets the grease’. Part of the way I retain sanity and process my struggles with Alexis and Ayden and their typical teenage attributes is to write about them (much to Alexis’ chagrin) and in doing so, often times Phoenix gets lumped into all that.

Well, it’s not really fair.

Phoenix is far from perfect. She is a perfectionist indeed, which is not necessarily a good thing, but that I definitely relate to. The perfectionist DNA she has is probably from genes she inherited from me. Alexis and Ayden say that Phoenix is my favorite. And that’s not true. But she is absolutely, hands-down my easiest. Our relationship comes easy. It always has. I was young, still living at home when my kids were born. My dad once made a comment when I was pregnant with Alexis, “Maybe if Phoenix wasn’t so easy, you wouldn’t think you needed to go out and get pregnant again so soon”. Lol. Thanks Dad.

Each of my kids hold a special place in my heart. My relationship with each is unique and special. The younger kids think that the way I treat Phoenix is a reflection of her being my favorite, but they can’t see that the way I treat her is really a reflection of how she treats me and how she treats her own life.

This girl. She is responsible, always does her very best, isn’t afraid of a challenge. She’s passionate, she’s fun, she’s funny. Phoenix is confident and beautiful. I love that she can dress up, and put her make up on, but that she is also fine wearing camo hunting gear and a naked face. She’ll kill a buck, and study to preserve wildlife. She’ll paint her toes, and catch a snake. She’ll read and write, and binge watch Netflix. And nothing is more important to her than family. When I ask her to do something… she does it. Sometimes she isn’t smiling. But she just gets it done. She is very honest. She makes choices for what she believes is best for her life and she talks to me about it… even when I disagree with her choices. I respect her for that. It makes me trust her more.

I gave kudos to Alexis for reading my blog. Phoenix reads it too.

Phoenix… You are light in the darkness. Keep taking the next right step, and don’t overthink the next 20 steps. Stay true to you. Remember that nothing is the end of the world. NOTHING! Let things slide off your back. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be OK with mistakes and move on. Don’t expect perfection. You are making fantastic memories right now. And when things go wrong, remember… it makes for a good story for later. You are going to be successful no matter what. There is no way you won’t be successful. You are wired for success. You are a hard-worker. Don’t be a worrier. Your college years will not be wasted whether you pursue a career in your major or you find something you love more. DON’T WORRY!! Enjoy this moment.

And thank you. Thank you so much for having a good attitude when we play games that you don’t want to play, for doing your chores without bitching, for texting me when you are away at college, for talking to me about your life, for respecting my authority. Thank you for being such an easy child to raise. Thank you for being such a pleasure.

And I’m sorry that sometimes you may not get the attention you deserve because I am putting out fires, trying to get a handle on other people in the family, working, or just distracted. You deserve the world by dear.

I love you more than you can even fathom, and just like I told your sister… there’s not one single thing you could ever do to make me love you more or less. I love you just for being you.

And just so everyone is very clear… this girl can get an A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E… just like her mama. I think it must run in the family. We’ve had our moments. But thank the good lord above, they are few and far between.

This is me, saying goodbye to Phoenix, leaving her at college